Bad news

[wiseheart]

And I mean REALLY bad news. Mum's taken a fall in the living room and dislocated her hip. After an hour spent in romantic discomfort on the floor the ambulance finally arrived and took her to the hospital. I wasn't allowed to go with her because of the f*cking plague. Nor will I be able to visit her. I wanted her to take my mobile phone but she panicked that she won't be able to deal with it, so no contact whatsoever.

I am really scared. I am scared shitless. I'm scared that they'll ruin her hip, just as the incompetent butchers in the other hospital ruined her shoulder twenty or so years ago. I'm scared that after a year of voluntary isolation she might get the cursed virus, after all. She's 89, for f*ck!s sake!

Somebody hand me a bucket, please, I feel the sheer irresistible urge to bawl...

Update: it turns out that the leg is broken, after all. Mum is now waiting for surgery.

Comments

[red-day-dawning.livejournal.com]

Hugs. I’m thinking of you and your Mum.

[wiseheart.livejournal.com]

Thank you. It means a lot!

[adafrog.livejournal.com]

Oh no! {{{{{hugs}}}}} You won't be able to call her in her room without the cell phone?

[wiseheart.livejournal.com]

Nope. This is the Wild East, after all.

[adafrog.livejournal.com]

:(

[elmey.livejournal.com]

Oh, I'm so sorry, I can understand why you're scared! Sending good thoughts and good wishes.

Will you be able to get updates from the hospital?

[wiseheart.livejournal.com]

I hope so, but one can never know.

[noadvertising.livejournal.com]

Oh dear, that's bad news, indeed! And at times like these, with that darn plague hindering us from visiting our loved ones! I'm keeping you and your mother in my thoughts.

[wiseheart.livejournal.com]

Thank you. *sigh*
At least last time she had some problem I could be there with her a lot. The thought that she id beyond my reach, suffering and alone, is really terrible.

[motodraconis.livejournal.com]

She may be more stoic this time perhaps? Just seen your update and it reminded me of Maman's op. I wasn't allowed to see her, but when I did manage to get through on the phone, she was woozy and tired and too busy with that to really be missing visits. As she got better, she was hugely distracted by the quality (or lack of) the food and enjoyed a good grumble (interspersed with compliments as sometimes the food was amazing, and other times diabolical) to the nurses about it.
I'm guessing they'll want to boot your mum out of hospital asap, so by the time she is starting to come out of her wooziness and pure survival mode to the point she might be starting to get more upset, she'll hopefully be ready to come home.

[wiseheart.livejournal.com]

God, I certainly hope so! A colleague offered her hubby's help with the residues toilet thingy before Mum is released — those 15 or so centimetres will be helpful, once she is mobile again. Even if I 'll have to visit the loo in high heels in the foreseeable future, as my legs are much shorter.

[motodraconis.livejournal.com]

I know it is not easy, but try and rest if you can, so your batteries are charged for her return. Hopefully they should be ringing you with good news after the op, which will help. It's not going to be easy for her, but she is being cared for and watched by experts, the nurses at least.

[wiseheart.livejournal.com]

Your words in God's ear!

[motodraconis.livejournal.com]

This is scary, and not being able to contact her makes it worse.

I've a chum who is a nurse in the NHS. The NHS is overwhelmed, but... they are really strict about segregating covid from the rest of the hospital. Also, Maman goes to hospital every 3 weeks for her cancer treatment and again, they are super strict and she's never had any issues. For the sake of their own people, they will be strict on that. Can't help about the hip worry, but maybe it'll help you a tiny bit regarding covid worry.

[wiseheart.livejournal.com]

Thank you, it does.

[curiouswombat.livejournal.com]

I am so sorry. It is bad enough when you are able to be there, I can only imagine how helpless it must feel to not be able to visit at all.

I can see from your comments that it is actually broken (is it at the top? A fractured neck of femur? I am only being nosy because, many years ago, I worked in an orthopaedic ward and that was the most common fracture in older ladies). I would hope they can get her home to you quite quickly after surgery.

As motodraconis says, hospital are doing their utmost to keep covid and non-covid patients separated, but I can understand it still being an added worry. I will remember you both in my prayers.

[wiseheart.livejournal.com]

I don't actually know what is broken. They didn't tell me and I forgot to ask, I was so in shock about the news. I'll try to find out more when I call them again.

[bk_forever]

Sending hugs and good wishes to you and your mum, that's such an awful thing to happen, and I hope everything will turn out well, or at least as well as possible considering her injury. Surely if she has to remain in hospital she should get the vaccine immediately to protect her. I hope that will be the case.

My thoughts and prayers are with you both.

[wiseheart.livejournal.com]

Thank you, my friend.

[manue7a.livejournal.com]

Oh no! Fingers crossed and good vibes sent.

[wiseheart.livejournal.com]

Thank you, we can use it!

[elwenlj.livejournal.com]

Oh love! What a time to have a fall. I hope them manage to pin the leg and get her home quickly.

[wiseheart.livejournal.com]

As I mentioned in my next entry, we shall pray that her bone will be able to hold the pin. Osteoporosis can be tricky. We've learned it when Grandma broke her leg.

[artemis10002000]

Oh god I'm so sorry! That's terrible. I can understand your fears so well.

I'm sending you the best wishes for the surgery, both for your mother's recovery and the doctors not fucking up. Keep us informed how the surgery went once you know, though getting news seems to be difficult

[wiseheart.livejournal.com]

There are some updates in the next entry. Thanks for the good wishes. We can use them.

[spikesgirl58.livejournal.com]

I will keep good thoughts for you. Hopefully she won't have to wait too log for surgery and will soon be back home.

[scrollwriter.livejournal.com]

Step 1. As best as you can, calm down, preferably with the assistance of friends to talk to, and if worse comes to worse, take a tranquilizer to quell emotions boiling over.
Step 2. Brace yourself for the possibility of the recovery taking a long time. There's nothing simple about someone, especially an older person, recovering from a hip injury. This will entail having the patience of Job while providing caregiver service, and letting her have some dignity with everyday situations, such as using the facilities and changing clothes.
Step 3. Do not let her refuse to take painkillers.
Step 4. Pray as hard as you can. This is not a time to not face spiritual reality. If you won't, I'll do it for you, whether you like it or not. However, you'll have to ask.
Step 5. Take one day at a time, and depend on your real friends as much as they can stand putting up with you during a challenging time, and difficult times ahead.

I wish you well.

[wiseheart.livejournal.com]

I know. I went through the same thing with Grandma; only that it was worse. Or so I hope. I'm a believer in God's mercy myself and I do pray. And I have wonderfully supportive friends and family... at least the one small branch of family we still have contact with. The others don't count.

[scrollwriter.livejournal.com]

The only bright side in this miserable situation is realising that major problems happen in a broken world, but solace is not impossible during hard times.

People can be difficult to deal with, and in my own personal experience, it's easier to depend on real friends rather than relatives.

Look after yourselves.

[meathiel]

*big hugs*

Hope surgery goes well and she's out there again soon.

[wiseheart.livejournal.com]

Apparently, surgery went well enough — at least she woke up as expected. We'll see the rest later.

[rcfinch.livejournal.com]

So sorry to hear this! And at her age, and during this pandemic... many hugs! But maybe it'll help a little if I tell you that my mother broke her hip at 89, got a replacement and recovered almost completely after physiotherapy.

[wiseheart.livejournal.com]

It does help indeed. It gives me new hope. Thanks.

[chocolate-frapp.livejournal.com]

oh my god, I'm so sorry.

[akane42me.livejournal.com]

Oh my god..
I'm so sorry this has happened. I hope you will be able to talk to the hospital staff and get regular updates.
Maybe you can go back and give the staff the phone and someone can help her with it.
Thinking of you, sending love, hugs, prayers for you and your Mum.

[wiseheart.livejournal.com]

Yeah, it's really bad luck, considering how often she's fallen in recent years and always in a lucky way. I guess everyone's luck runs out at a certain point.

So far we've managed the phone problem — halfway. She can take calls but finds the buttons too small to actually dial. But getting calls isn't bad, either, so we are content.

[akane42me.livejournal.com]

When my father had to live in a nursing home my brother got Dad a cell phone, but Dad was never able to manage using it. The buttons were too small! And it was completely new technology to him, so even answering our calls was quite hard for him. I'm glad she can take calls! It's got to be a great comfort to talk to family and friends. Wishing both of you all the best, so you can have your dear Mum home soon.

[amedia.livejournal.com]

I actually saw some of the later posts before I saw this one, but all the same, I'm sending warm wishes, virtual hugs, and prayers toward your mom. And you, because this has to be a scary and frustrating time. {{{{wiseheart}}}}

[wiseheart.livejournal.com]

Thank you. Yes, it is scary and frustrating — above all because I can't go to her and support her emotionally. Fortunately she's one tough cookie, so I hope for the best.

[mirasaui.livejournal.com]

Coming in here late, so sorry to hear about your Mum.

[wanderingmogwai.livejournal.com]

I'm reading entries in reverse so I am here from the future. I am SO glad your mom could get home and really start recovering as soon as she did! *hugs*