Sooo, the secret of a long and happy life is...

[wiseheart]

... to avoid doctors at any costs. Present company excluded, of course, forgive me, ithilwen.

Warning: bad words behind the tag!

My odyssey started with going to our family doctor because of the strange whistling noise within my right ear when I spoke - most likely a result of a local cold or whatnot. But since I'd had tinnitus in that air for 4 or 5 years already, I got frightened that it might be getting worse. So I went to see the doctor.

She then sent me to the ear, nose and throat specialist as well as to ultrasound. The ear, nose and throat specialist sent me to a hearing test, and when I brought her back the results, she sent me to the neurologist and to the rheumatologist... two visits due in early February.

The ultrasound showed that my neck veins are in the best order, so the tinnitus cannot vome from those. In exchange, they found three tiny goitre-like knots and an equally tiny cyst in my thyroid gland. Seeing the results, the family doctor has now ordered a blood test, to see whether the thyroid gland is working properly.

You see the pattern? I'm completely healthy, I have no problems whatsoever, and the whistling sound in my ear stopped after two days of keeping it nice and warm. And yet I've been going from doctor to doctor for the last two months and will probably do so for who knows how long, and there's a good chance that wherever I go, they'll find something! Because I'm 55 years old, overweight, have a stressful job and no time to prepare healthy food or go to training or what the fuck I ought to do about it.

I want to the doctor because of my fucking ear, and it's all right again, and yet there's no way to stop this avalanche any longer! And yeah, I know my blood sugar will be high and my cholesterol level will be in high heavens, and I don't care, because with the kind of life I lead, I won't be able to do anything about it - not before next summer, and there's a good chance that not even then, as they want us to work in summer holidays another two weeks in summer camp.

The worst part is, I'll be living in fear because of the blood test for the next week and a half. Because that's the earliest time I can go and have it. And because - due to Mum's illness - I know now how many things there are in such a test that can mean that something is wrong.

I was a content and practically healthy person two months ago. Now I'm a nervous wreck who can't think of anything else than what the fuck they will find next time.

Comments

[jenn-calaelen.livejournal.com]

*hugs* Good luck! I hope they don't find anything bad, and don't need more tests.

It does seem odd that doctors seem to be much better at finding things wrong with people who feel healthy than with people who feel ill. But I suppose that's life!

Also, I hope they don't make you work in your summer holiday - that seems unfair given how hard you work the rest of the time!

[wiseheart.livejournal.com]

Thanks. *hugs back*

Actually, Mum and I have discussed things and I decided not to go to the neurologist and the rheumatologist, after all. She'll have my appointments cancelled. It's so with these unnecessary tests that they get new and new ideas all the time, send you to new and new unnecessary tests, and in the end, a healthy person ends up a total hypochondriac. I don't need that additionally to my complicated life.

We'll definitely have to work during summer holiday, though. Perhaps I can escape it this summer, as there are quite a few people who're younger than I and who came later to work for our school, but within a year or two, it will be my turn.

If I consider that in the previous, oh-so-oppressing regime I could have retired with full old-age pension this year, and instead I'll have to work at least seven or eight additional years (if they're going to keep me), I could kill people and break things. Assuming that polticians count as people, which I very much doubt.

[artemis10002000]

*hug* Eeeek! That's horrible!

Stay strong and try not to let the doctors drive you crazy! :)

[wiseheart.livejournal.com]

Worked out escape method - sort of. (See my answer to jenn_calaelen)

Sent you yummy Tosh goodness via e-mail; I hope you've got it. And "Lost in the Past" has been updated - or have I already told you that? *is confused*

[artemis10002000]

Yeah, you told me that and I have "Lost in the Past" in another browser tab for when I'm done with email replies:) I saw the e-mail, too, yay! I don't think I'll review tonight, though, I don't think I could come up with a coherent review *yawn*

[wiseheart.livejournal.com]

That's all right, I just can't remember whom I've said what when I'm on the verge of a nervous breakdown like this. *sighs*
This is the week of Hell, when I spend every single afternoon at school for various reasons, had three different doctor's appointments and generally beside myself. Sorry for pestering you. Have a good night!

[artemis10002000]

No, you're not pestering me! *hug*

I'm quite impressed you managed to write anything at all between the stress. I know I wouldn't have managed it.

[wiseheart.livejournal.com]

That's my escape, my survival technique and my coping mechanism all rolled in one. Writing is what keeps me sane - well, as sane as I can ever be.

[artemis10002000]

It's great that you can escape into writing like this! I find writing an escape as well, but I often can't write when I'm stressed.

[thelittlestkiwi.livejournal.com]

Aw... you sound like you need a hug. *hugs*
On that note, it seems that doctors get WAY to excited about this. We're people, not test subjects! >.<
But it's nice that writing is your escape from reality. I've known people without one... very scary at times.

[skyfiery.livejournal.com]

It's so with these unnecessary tests that they get new and new ideas all the time, send you to new and new unnecessary tests, and in the end, a healthy person ends up a total hypochondriac. I don't need that additionally to my complicated life.

I'm agreeing so much with this statement.

You're okay, sis. *hugs*

[wiseheart.livejournal.com]

Thank you. :) Hugs are always welcome.

[wiseheart.livejournal.com]

It has been my experience that writing is quite cathartic. I can "write out" the stress of my system. Or the deep sadness. Probably this is why I don't need therapy.

[wiseheart.livejournal.com]

Thank you, little sis. *hugs back* And you are a jewel.

[artemis10002000]

*hug* It's more enjoyable than therapy, too!

[wiseheart.livejournal.com]

True. Speaking of which: have I actually attached the finished Singh 02 file to my last e-mail? The copies arrived to my alternate addie without the attachment, so either they got eaten in cyberspace, or I was too sleep-deprived last night.

Off to bake Versunkenen Apfelkuchen for Mum's upcoming birthday, as her oldest, bestest lady friend is visiting tomorrow.

[artemis10002000]

Awk, I can't believe I didn't notice it! I must have been more tired than I realized last night. (I usually download the file only when I read it so I won't download and then forget about it.)

[wiseheart.livejournal.com]

I've just re-sent it. Hopefully it will work out now.

[artemis10002000]

Brother Iefan 07 and Singh 02, got it!

[rcfinch.livejournal.com]

I bet doctors have to 'score', too, like policemen who have to write a minimal number of tickets/month (at least, they have where I am). That would explain why people are being sent on to specialista so often for something they never complained about. In NL, we've already seen the first insurance company striking hospitals from their list because they don't carry out certain operations/treatments often enough. That's the kind of mentality that would turn everyone into patients - if people let them. Kudos (to your mum as well)for canceling these appointments!

[wiseheart.livejournal.com]

Gah, that's a relief!

[wiseheart.livejournal.com]

Thanks. I won't let them make me ill when I'm not, dammit! Besides they're not likely to be able to do anything against my tinnitus anyway, as I won't let them experiment on my ear. Yeah, the condition is annoying, but a recurring one, not a continuous one, and otherwise my hearing is just fine, so - no!

[jenn-calaelen.livejournal.com]

Actually, Mum and I have discussed things and I decided not to go to the neurologist and the rheumatologist, after all.
Very sensible! I'm very much in favour of not worrying about the chances of things that could be wrong.

Ouch! It really sounds horrible all the things your work puts you through! Politicians really don't don't as people - given all the things they get up to. If only progress really ment progress, but it really seems to be trading one set of problems for another.

[jilba.livejournal.com]

you know most docs are never happy unless they find a new disease in you. Some of them think it justifies their existance or something. I'm sure you'll be fine :)

[ithilwen.livejournal.com]

That's the wonderful thing about medicine; we can always find something wrong with you if we just look hard enough! It's guaranteed job security. :D

Here's hoping that you'll be able to stay way from my kind for a long time to come, once the current drama's over.